Ooooh sh*!

I forgot to pay the car note last month !!!! What’s worse is that I spent the money thinking I had extra money in my account for fun ! Big mistake !!! 

Our truck is under my boyfriend’s name and his mom. Some of our mail is still going to our previous address which is his parents house. Since the letter had her name on it she opened it and called us tonight asking if we were having money problems and if we need money to pay the truck because she received a letter that it has not been paid. How absolutely embarrassing. To me at least. Edgardo came into the room and asked me if I had paid the car and I said oh s!!t. I completely forgot to. I normally don’t have time to get on the computer , I take care of all my bills through my phone and that’s the one bill I do online on my laptop. 

I quickly realized I had screwed us over because I only had the money for next month’s rent and like $50 extra. So I told him the amount I had and he’s like well where the money I gave you for the car payment? And I’m like I don’t think you gave it to me. I was in disbelief that I could have possibly spent a car payment when I don’t even go out and shop. So I’m looking through my bank statement, but I was so in shock about it all and the kids are talking to us and Camila won’t stay still that I couldn’t even concentrate on my bank statements. So I quickly just look at the deposits for the month and add those up because I’m still sitting there thinking he couldn’t have given me enough money to pay the car. So we add the deposits and it does leave us with $200 left over and he’s wondering where it went. 

I get online to pay the car and he leaves the room .I can tell he’s stressed and becoming angry. I told him to calm down and I’m signing in to pay the car. He’s freaking out and asking me what money I’m going to use to pay it. I told him I have some cash I put away and I could deposit tomorrow but I would for now use the money for next month’s rent. 

So there the car is paid. With the cash I had put away I really only took $80 from the rent money and we would have to make up for. But to him it was still unacceptable. I go downstairs to get the baby from him and tell him that there is no point on getting angry. He says well I want to know where the $200 went or how did they disappear. I said “ok I’ll print out bank statements and you could look to see why it all did not add up.” I also asked him to deposit the cash to my account and he replied that he’s going to stay really late at work tomorrow so he doesn’t want to stop at the bank after. Since I realized he wasn’t going to cheer up in anyway tonight I just went upstairs and put the baby to sleep. 

Once the baby was asleep I logged in to my bank account and looked to see where I had spent this money and how much he really gave me. Once I was able to clear that out I sent him a text message so he can read when he is awake for work to where I was wrong in spending money and also that what he gave me was not enough. We are both at fault. 

After being shocked about it all I felt so helpless. Helpless because I don’t bring in any income and in a moment like this I can’t help. I don’t like to see him stress over money and when he does again I feel helpless. 

After feeling helpless I started to look on the brighter side and feel like we should be thankful. Thankful that we had that extra cash that I was saving for a rainy day or just letting it pile up as another savings stash. Also thankful that he has a job where they let him work overtime and that helps out a lot. I fully understand that he doesn’t want to work more than 8-9 hours a day , who does? But he is able to put in 4-5 hours overtime if he wants to. I think that’s something to be thankful for. 

What a night it has been. I really hope I never forget to pay the car note again. I’ll still feel helpless until the day I can work again, but for now I have to stay dedicated and thankful for being a stay at home mom. 

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